June 27th, 2006

everything that I’m doing right now is something I haven’t done before. And everyone who’s involved is someone I haven’t met before! And for the first time in months, I don’t have any anxiety. i started taking some supplements yesterday, well actually herbal supplements and minerals. Some anxiety pills which are crushed herbs in pill form. I take 1-2 3x daily and put them under my tongue. And I take a complex B vitamin twice daily. I love using the word daily, it’s like when else would you take them?

I’m on an airplane right now headed to LA to be meeted and greeted by a girl named Amy. She’s one of the producers for the first film I’m working on. I feel pretty prepared for this. I’m hoping to learn a lot and grow as a person. I’m looking forward to callaborating with people. I hope we all get along for the most part. For some reason this trip feels totally normal or maybe it’s the fact that I’m overtired and probably over stressed and out of my mind?! No.

For some time I’ve been telling people that my lifestyle is very nomadic. I have no home right now. Well, no home that I pay rent on, but my parent’s have gladly opened their home to me. I moved out of emmy’s and pretty much had one day to pack and put everything away at my mom’s and dad’s. God has taught me in a major way how to live out of a bag. It’s very strange when I come home after a trip and I see tons of clothes in the closet. Part of me wwants to throw them all away and continue living out of my bag, but part of me is like, “Oh, yeah, I own that skirt! I love that skirt!”

The rocky’s are right outside my window. Yeah, I have a window seat.

There are these kids on the plane and they’re crying and screaming. Sucks they have to be in such close quarters and be patient. That’s hard on everyone. Especially the parents.

There was this indie rocker boy at the airport who was sleeping a couple seats down from me. I couldn’t help but stare at him. He was totally sprawled out with half his body on one chair and the other half on another chair, on his back, legs crossed, head thrown back. It’s like he head fallen there and slept where he fell. He looked so exhausted and so beautiful while he slept. Such dark hair and eyelashes and a black hoodie. I was imagining his eyes were a blue green colour, but when he woke up for boarding he had brown eyes. It’s so weird how I was looking at him while he was sleeping and I thought I had a grasp on what he looked like, but with his eyes oopen he looked much different. Eyes says so much. They really add a lot. Well, I guess each feature, nose, eyes, mouth, cheeks, eyebrows, browline, forehead, they’re all so different. Now wonder each face is so different.